“How do we wait for something we need so badly, something we know for certain is God’s will, and something that we just can’t live another day without? We must wait patiently and confidently, not complaining. To do otherwise would be to insult God by displaying a lack of faith in His ability to deliver. We renew our strength by “waiting” for the Lord (Is 40:31).”
Yes, it’s lent season and I haven’t given you guys my two cents yet.
It’s a strange habit that my mind has. Whenever I try to study for exams, my mind just wanders away and the energy that should be spent on trying to remember what I’ve just read, simply transfers into things that my overthinking produces. Hence, I overthink – a lot. It’s one of my worst habits because this overthinking just leads me to emotions that I don’t want to feel. I don’t want to spend my day in doubt, insecurity and anxiety. Especially now, during lent. I want to be at peace with myself and my circumstances. That’s what I want for myself. And how is that possible? In trusting and relying only on Him.
Yes, I am a work in progress. I haven’t yet gotten to the point where I can confidently say to my struggles ‘Come at me, bro, I’m ready!’ After everything that has happened last year, I can say that there’s still a lot of mending to do. The broken pieces apparently take time to heal bit by bit. Fears have to be overcome. The mindset has to be right. And hope most importantly should never be lost. Out of everything that is still unclear to me, situations where I don’t know what specifically is going to happen, I know where I want to be and I know how my heart should look like. Step by step I want to get there because I know He uses ordinary people to create something extraordinary and I seriously want to be part of that.
And during this lent, I feel especially blessed and grateful. Even though the struggles are always here and they won’t fade that quickly, somehow I’ve learned to keep my eyes on what’s worth. And during the first week of lent, He affirmed so many things in my heart. He knows my heart. I’ve kept the faith, you should too!
My flesh may fail, but my God you never will.